Certified

Because I can.

Looking to hire a driver?

I'm a face you'll never miss when you're in class.

I OWN!



FWAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
I'm such a thick skinned motherfucker.

Peace out! =)

I was searching for sources for premarital sex in teenagers and I happen to come across this bullshit website which is pretty much fucked up... and entertaining.. and fucked up.

Answer by FAG Submitted on 8/29/2005

Hi. I have sex with my dad every night, and he hasn't had his period for a while (he used to be a woman) so can he get pregnant if he's undergoing hormone therapy?



Answer by Doug Funny Submitted on 8/29/2005

If you have anal sex, be prepared to hear these words: Da Doy Daught Da Dasket Ball




Answer by LUE is teh KEWL Submitted on 8/29/2005
I HAVE AIDS LOLZ




Answer by http://www.BabyNames.com Submitted on 8/30/2005
You'll be needing this.

http://www.BabyNames.com




Answer by PenguinPedo Submitted on 8/31/2005
Having testicals increases your chances of getting a girl pregnant, to help prevent unwanted pregnancies please punch yourself rapidly in the testicals before sex.




Answer by angelhug Submitted on 8/31/2005
Hay i wuz just wunderin like can u get pregnant if ur bf jacks off in a shotof whiskey n pours it in ur cooter or i give him head n then eat sumthin n lick my fingurz n finger myself? i rly need 2 kno cuz i liek havnt ever had a period n im geting nervous and i like cake n my mom told me if i get pregnant i cant have any cake?Thanx luv u all




Answer by nappy d Submitted on 8/31/2005
hey meh gf and me had had the bset sexxor evar. but last nghit she told me shes a lsebain. we have unprottekted sex... can she get pegnant even fi shes a lsebain?




Answer by VGD Submitted on 9/2/2005
You guys are all retarded.




Answer by Bored. Submitted on 8/30/2005
How stupid are you people get an education, take sex ed and stay in school.

I swear I was mesmerized by these sheer amount of stupidity. Especially the joker who posted she likes cake and if she got pregnant her mom wont give her any cake ever LOL.

PEACE OUT =)

I do not comprehend

Warning : Long ass post



You know the times where you're just bored out of your own mind and porn just isn't as entertaining as it should have been. You'd search through the whole contact list in your MSN messenger to look for the perfect victim for one of your mischiefs.





Thats what I did and behold, The Chronicles of Jan Yong : The Verb, The Grammar and the Dumbass.


Victim : Suezan
Age : 19
Bimbometer : [ | | | | | | | ] - 80%
Codename : Waterfish ( 水 魚 : shui yi)




<---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------->

It starts with...




♪ sυεzαи. says:
why i never hear you speaking in chinese


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
coz my chinese sux


♪ sυεzαи. says:
i think so too


♪ sυεzαи. says:
haha


♪ sυεzαи. says:
like a banana boy only


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
then wad


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
like u ah


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
chinabeng only


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
speak england so lousy


♪ sυεzαи. says:
lousy meh


♪ sυεzαи. says:
you sux lah. say i chinabeng



<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
i suck


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
not i sux


♪ sυεzαи. says:
what's the differnt between i suck and i sux.



One thing, I don't know why..



<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
it'll be


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
you suck


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
or suezan sucks


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
not you sucks


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
and suezan suck


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
understand or not



I doesn't even matter how hard you try...



♪ sυεzαи. says:
OMG i said you sux lah. since when i used the S


♪ sυεzαи. says:
where got s you tell me lah. open your eye wider


♪ sυεzαи. says:
do you need another pair of spec


♪ sυεzαи. says:
GRR


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
SUX = SUCKS


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
U DUMBO


♪ sυεzαи. says:
you say only what


♪ sυεzαи. says:
my sux is equal to SUCK without the S


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
HOW DOES SUX SOUND LIKE SUCK


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
wtf


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
u made ur own language somemore


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
so sorry i couldnt understand YOUR language

♪ sυεzαи. says:
sux is pronounce at suck wihout S


♪ sυεzαи. says:
is international language lah


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
sorry sorry i'm wrong


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
you're right


♪ sυεzαи. says:
talking to your make me IQ goes lower HAHA


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
sorry la i stupid mar... i didnt know that language so hard to understand


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
lucky you teach me or else ppl sure laugh at me


♪ sυεzαи. says:
i want to ask are you just been sarcastic or what


<.Jan-Yong.> said : "I'm sane, its the world that's crazy!" says:
i might be



<---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------->


In the end, I couldn't comprehend. I'm still pretty shocked actually. Thought it might be fun to share it with you guys, no?

Peace out! =)

Fuel prices hikes again!

When?

Effective from Wednesday midnight.

How much?

A whopping 78 cents which totals to a whopping RM2.70 per liter and an ugly RM2.58 for diesel.



I'm sure this is a major issue for every Malaysian as this increase in petrol prices is the biggest margin we have ever had. Inflation is inevitable for this time's increase in petrol prices. What's gonna happen to us? Well, expect your regular bowl of pan mee to downsize in portion topped with an increase in price.



Someone said that petrol prices wouldn't soar until September. I'm quite sure everyone knows that old man.

Likewise, this is the time to use my Economics lecturer's ideology in which he has always been obsessed with ever since i took Economics in ICPU.



Mr.Moaz : "The government should invest in public transportations...The government should invest in public transportations...The government should invest in public transportations...The government should invest in public transportations...The government should invest in public transportations...The government should invest in public transportations...The government should invest in public transportations...The government should invest in public transportations...The government should invest in public transportations..."



Right! Thank you Mr.Moaz, we are heavily affected by the increase in petrol prices mainly because most Malaysians owns a car rather than using public transportations. More money spent on fuel means a tighter budget, a tighter budget means a need for higher wages which is really the last thing you'd get from your boss.


And it doesn't seem that Malaysia has any excess money to spend on public transportations. Thanks to subsidizing our petrol and making it almost the cheapest in the world, we have nothing left to improve our infrastructure. Subsidizing to keep the petrol prices low for Malaysians was a good idea, but we're being taken advantage of.




Who?!

Our neighboring countries, Thailand and Singapore.

But how?!

Who wouldn't drive over the border and pump our cheap petrol? Sure we had some weird policy which goes foreigners within 10km from the border are not to be allowed to pump Malaysian petrol. But hey, are the petrol station's employees going to stop a customer from committing an act of purchase? I don't think so, or at least the person with the right track of mind wouldn't stop a customer from being.... a customer.


Some ideas I've gathered to that people can live with the heightened petrol prices.

1. Drive at your car's optimum speed.

2. Use the public transportations and get ready to smell some armpits or backsides if you're short.

3. Eat less so you can pump more.

4. Change your fuel consumption to a hybrid that uses gas as the price remains intact.

5. Ride a bicycle and run on your own natural fuel which you don't need.

6. Make use of your friends as means of transportations.

7. Lose some weight as more weight means more fuel to get your ass moving, fatso.


I witnessed jokers trying to save money before the fuel price increases at midnight. So all the cars would queue up to get the cheap prices before it increases.



I was innocent, I had 1/2 tank left so I didn't need to pump, I just needed burgers for my empty stomach. Turns out I was able to leave home and not come back until after midnight thanks to those jokers that are trying to save money.

Life

What is life?

What does it mean to be alive?

Does it mean to breathe? To exist? To survive?

Sometimes I wonder if we were brought into this world for a purpose.

If we hadn't, then why are we a part of this world?

Why do we strive to continue living on, knowing that obstacles are being thrown at us everyday?

Are we living for the sake of others, or for the sake of ourselves?

Or is it just for the sake of survival?

The moment we start living, we start dying.

Why struggle to cling on to life?

When we know that it will all be over one day?

Is it for the enjoyable memories that we shared that gets us through everyday?

Or the smiles of the close ones that we live by.

Why is life so uncertain?

Yet death is only certain thing in life.

To me,

Life is but a mere sensation.

Nothing more, nothing less.